


to have a timeless love

by jackgyeoms



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Accidental Threesome, Carter is the best wingman for his girl, Misunderstandings, Multi, Mutual Pining, Soulmates, Threesome - F/M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-05
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-28 12:43:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10101320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jackgyeoms/pseuds/jackgyeoms
Summary: They’d avoided each other since Carter’s return. Kendra hadn’t mentioned Carter in any close terms to Ray, so Ray hadn’t deemed himself able to ask, but that meant that there was always this space between them. It was a silhouette with wings and a deep voice that held words like soulmate and forever.





	

**Author's Note:**

> this started as an atomichawk prompt from kendrasaunders and ended as atomichawkmates whoops
> 
> unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own

 

They’d avoided each other since Carter’s return. Kendra hadn’t mentioned Carter in any close terms to Ray, so Ray hadn’t deemed himself able to ask, but that meant that there was always this space between them. It was a silhouette with wings and a deep voice that held words like soulmate and forever.

When he came back to himself, to _her_ , Kendra ran and threw her arms around Carter’s shoulders, clung to him in the same way that she would cling to Ray. He’d had to look away because they were blinding together and beside them, he felt so dull.

Kendra and Carter had debated leaving and although that thought made Ray’s stomach clench, it wasn’t as bad as the blow to the chest he feels when he sees them together. Always across the room. Always standing so close, visages of power and beauty and eternal love. He always found an excuse to leave if they were there because they were a reminder that whatever he and Kendra had had was meaningless in comparison.

He didn’t love her enough for fate to deem him worthy of her.

He wasn’t worthy enough to considered as forever.

He wasn’t enough.

He would hate Carter if that were possible. He’d tried it for a while and it had only lasted four days. Carter was an arsehole, yes, but he was too charming, too righteous, too beautiful a human being to hate.

He’d have to be, wouldn’t he, for Kendra to love him across so many lifetimes.

Ray caught Kendra watching him a few times. He’d always know if she was, could feel the weight of her gaze with far more intensity than any other. He’d met her stare a few times at the beginning, let himself give into the echo of his heartbeat in his ear and the softness in her dark eyes. But as time passed, his heartbeat sounded like mocking and the softness felt like pity and he couldn’t bare it.

If he had to, Ray looked at the space over her shoulder.

He thought he could get through it. Thought he would adjust to the cold space in his bed and the loneliness behind closed door. He thought he would look at her and see their friendship more than any forever love he might have felt. He thought he’d be able to sit with Carter and drink and talk like teammates and not think of everything Carter was that he wasn’t.

He didn’t get the chance to see if it would be the case before Carter cornered him.

He fisted Ray’s shirt and slammed him into a wall, not enough to wind him but enough to mean business. Ray scrambled, his own hands griping over Carter’s as if he, without his suit, had enough strength to pry the immortal’s fingers from him, and his mind raced with adrenaline.

“What are you doing?” Carter demanded, and Ray babbled his uncertainty. He wondered if it was about 1959 and the ring that Kendra had worn on her finger up until recently. He wondered if this was rage fuelled by jealousy, and knew he’d be unable to fight back against the tide of it.

Carter frowned. “You’re avoiding her. Why?”

Ray stilled. “Oh.”

“Oh?” Carter repeated the words disbelievingly. “I thought you were supposed to be a genius – is that all you can say?”

Ray felt rage flare. He struggled once more. “What does it matter to you what I do?”

“She’s upset. She won’t admit it of course, but she is. I can see it.” Carter’s fingers loosen their hold but he doesn’t pull away. Ray stopped fighting.

Upset. Kendra’s upset.

When they were stuck, she’d always been so positive. She believed that he would find them a way home, even when he no longer did. It was Kendra who filled the halls with laughter so contagious that it couldn’t be helped. It was Kendra who had come to him that first time, plastered herself against his side and smiled so sweetly when she asked him to come to bed.

“Why?” Ray’s voice was rough to his own ears.

Carter’s eyebrows knit together and his lips press together. “You sure you’re as smart as everyone says you are?” Ray opened his mouth, insulted and prepared to snap cruelty, but he was already continuing. “She loves you, idiot.”

Nothing felt stranger than hearing those words from Carter’s mouth. He didn’t spit them like Ray had expected. He didn’t curl his lips in distaste. In fact, he just sounded exasperated and so certain. Ray hadn’t felt that much certainty in such a long time.

He swallowed. “Yeah?”

Ray isn’t too sure what he looks like in those moments – maybe scared, maybe shy, maybe terrifyingly hopeful – but Carter’s gaze softened. His fingers unfurled and flattened so they were spread across Ray’s chest. He wondered if Carter could feel the racing of his heart, or knew how much warmth he was pressing into cold-for-too-long flesh.

“Yeah.”

He didn’t say more. He didn’t need to.

Carter pulled away then, let the cold air seep in and Ray shivered. Carter’s hand was out, beckoned Ray forward, and Ray was weak. He couldn’t _not_ take it.

Fingers curled around his own and tugged until his legs fell into step. Carter led Ray through the cramped halls of the Waverider, towards the private quarters and then to his room. Ray had never been in there – Kendra had shared with Carter at the beginning, but once she and Ray were together, she’d moved into Ray’s room. He still had some of her clothes folded in a pile at the foot of his bed. He hadn’t had the nerve to bring them back to her yet.

But now, Carter let them in with ease and Kendra was there, spread across the bed with a book before her. The rooms are almost identical and for a moment, Ray could remember a time when he’d enter his room and Kendra would be laid out on the sheets in the exact same way.

She looked up and her expression flickered between surprise, fear and hurt before it was skilfully controlled. That softness was there again. Was it pity? Or was it love?

_She loves you._ Carter’s voice echoed back.

“Ray…” she drew out his name, trailed off uncertainly. She pulled herself up from her stomach and onto her knees. Her gaze darted to Carter and back again. “What’s happening?”

“You love him,” Carter stated so nonchalantly as if he were merely reciting a shopping list. Ray winced and Kendra’s eyes widened. She opened her mouth like she wanted to deny it, fight back – Ray wasn’t sure, but Carter doesn’t let her either way, continuing on, “It’s the truth, isn’t it? And he loves you. Another truth.”

Both eyes were on Ray now. Both wanted him to confirm, both wanted him to deny.

“I…” Ray stopped. Carter tilted his head, arched an eyebrow. Encouragement, maybe, but that didn’t mean that when the words, “I do. I love you,” slipped passed it lips in front of Carter that Ray didn’t feel uncomfortable.

He hurried on. “But it’s fine. You’re with Carter. We had what we had and – I understand. It’s fine.”

Kendra said his name again, pushed herself onto her feet and padded towards him. Her eyes were shiny and soft. He can’t bear the thought of looking her in them.

She won’t let him glance away. Her fingers were calloused and warm when she held onto his chin, angled his head down until he was watching her. She was enchanting this close, every bit the goddess that he could never forget she was.

“Why?” she’s not talking to him, Ray realised quickly, but Carter.

The man was still holding onto Ray’s hand, fingers intertwined and Ray didn’t remember agreeing for his fingers to do that. If he looked way now, he might have seen the calculating look in Carter’s eyes as he considered them, or the satisfied quirk of his lips. But he didn’t, which meant he only felt when Carter rubbed his thumb affectionately over Ray’s knuckles.

“I want only you and your happiness,” Carter replied, “And if Ray Palmer is that…”

He closed the distance there so that his shoulders bumped with Ray’s and the palm of his free hand was able to slide along the curve of Kendra’s hip.

Ray didn’t breathe for a moment, afraid that if he were too loud, he’d ruin this. Carter’s meaning hung in the air between them. A well of hopefulness filled and overflowed within Ray. He can’t tear his eyes away from Kendra – his Kendra, Carter’s Kendra, Kendra’s Kendra – who had been willing to share her name and her life with him, for however long that life may be.

Kendra was seeing all this. She had to be. She wouldn’t let him look away.

“I love you,” Kendra declared and it wasn’t clear who she was speaking to.

They both answered anyway. “I love you too.”

Ray knew his voice was raw, broken in comparison to Carter’s confidence of the truth, and maybe he should feel self-conscious about it. But how can he, when Kendra was smiling at him like that? Like he was worthy?

He said it again, “I love you.” And again, “I love you, I love you.”

He only stopped because Kendra put her lips over his to swallow those confessions.

He didn’t continue because Carter was pressing against his hip, tongue flicking against his bottom lip in the most distracting fashion, and muttering into his skin, “Can I too? Can I?”

He can’t continue when he nodded his head because words were lost to him now, and Carter slid their lips together into something slow and sloppy and breathtaking.

Ray thought it though. Thought it when he was able to trace Kendra’s cheekbones with his mouth. Thought it when he dragged his tongue between the valley of her breast on his journey to her sensitive nipples. Thought it when Kendra moaned and held his head to her chest and Carter blanketed himself over Ray’s back and muttered filthy promises into his ear.

_I love you. I love you. I love you._

 

**Author's Note:**

> [feel free to follow me on my tumblr trash heap](http://gladers.co.vu)


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